Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman

I’m sure you have heard of the phenomenon that is Emotional Intelligence. Put simply, the concept of Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is the ability to understand, use and manage your own emotions in positive ways to communicate effectively, empathise with others and overcome challenges more effectively.


When used effectively EQ can help you build stronger relationships, succeed at work and school, and achieve your career and personal goals.


YOU CAN BUY THE BOOK HERE


IN THIS BOOK, GOLEMAN STATES THAT EQ CAN BE COMMONLY DEFINED BY FOUR MAIN ATTRIBUTES:

  1. Self-management – You’re able to control impulsive feelings and behaviours, manage your emotions in healthy ways, take initiative, follow through on commitments, and adapt to changing circumstances.

  2. Self-awareness – You recognise your own emotions and how they affect your thoughts and behaviour. You know your strengths and weaknesses, and have self-confidence.

  3. Social awareness – You have empathy. You can understand the emotions, needs, and concerns of other people, pick up on emotional cues, feel comfortable socially, and recognise the power dynamics in a group or organisation.

  4. Relationship management – You know how to develop and maintain good relationships, communicate clearly, inspire and influence others, work well in a team, and manage conflict.

KEY EXCERPTS FROM THIS BOOK:

“In a very real sense we have two minds, one that thinks and one that feels.” “Anyone can become angry —that is easy. But to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose, and in the right way —this is not easy.”ARISTOTLE, The Nicomachean Ethics


A belligerent samurai, an old Japanese tale goes, once challenged a Zen master to explain the concept of heaven and hell. The monk replied with scorn, "You're nothing but a lout - I can't waste my time with the likes of you!" His very honor attacked, the samurai flew into a rage and, pulling his sword from its scabbard, yelled "I could kill you for your impertinence." "That," the monk calmly replied, "is hell." Startled at seeing the truth in what the master pointed out about the fury that had him in its grip, the samurai calmed down, sheathed his sword, and bowed, thanking the monk for the insight. "And that," said the monk "is heaven." The sudden awakening of the samurai to his own agitated state illustrates the crucial difference between being caught up in a feeling and becoming aware that you are being swept away by it. Socrates's injunction "Know thyself" speaks to the keystone of emotional intelligence: awareness of one's own feelings as they occur.”

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